What did DJ Lucky Light Say?

The DJ Lucky Light Interview

Introduction

Aar: Hi, welcome back to Neuro Rainbow Cast with Autisticly Aar the podcast where I explore neurodivergency in colour with a range of guests discussing what it means to be neurodivergent . 

Today's guest is DJ Lucky Light. a DJ based in Seattle. America, which. It was great to be able to get on the call and record this episode took a few weeks, a few weeks to months. This was a great interview Lucky's first ever podcast appearance. In this interview I chat to her about her experiences as a DJ, an edm dj and dance shuffler. how she got her diagnosis? The experiences of having  been parented by her mother who has ADHD, bringing up autistic children herself, shuffle dancing and what comforts her which includes using adult sized pacifiers. something I can relate to as I use adult pacifiers myself . 

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Getting to know DJ Lucky Light

Lucky Light (She/Her): my name is Lucky Lucky Light. My pronouns are she, her. I'm a DJ and a shuffle dancer and I'm also ADHD autistic, and I have type 1 diabetes. 

Recognising traits of autism and ADHD, and, how they compare to anxiety disordered panic attacks

Autisticly Aar (they/them): ADHD isn't something that I've seen you touch upon on social media. Do you want to start by going into how you got diagnosed and understood that you were autistic and ADHD and about that.

Lucky Light (She/Her): Growing up my best childhood friend was diagnosed autistic as a young child. He was a boy and we were very close. We played very well together because I was female, I was much better at masking. I was always just like the quirky. The interesting girl or like the weird girl which was fine.I didn't mind that. But I definitely had, you know, things about me that my mom always just was like, she's just cool. She's just interesting. And it wasn't until I was a mom and I was dealing with my own children who were showing signs of things. And I was kind of deep diving into maybe how can I help them?Learning that they were autistic. As well, and when I was 20, that's when I was speaking to a doctor about it, and then from there saw a neuropsychologist and was diagnosed at 21, and in the States as an adult, it's very hard to get an autistic diagnosis when you're an adult. They usually only offer it for children in the United States. You have to really push for it. them to even, like, evaluate you, because they don't see, like, a reason for you to have that. And so I really had to push for the fact that I felt like something was going on and it was affecting my ability to work and social life. And so I was able to get the autism diagnosis when I was 21 I was easily diagnosed at 18 with ADHD. That would, that became, that came before being diagnosed with autism. And yeah, that's kind of how the diagnosis came about. I kept looking at  mood disorders, like depression or like bipolar and kept trying to maybe figure out what was causing some of my meltdowns.

Lucky Light (She/Her): And I never felt like I fit in a specific box. Nothing ever was quite like, Oh yes, that's exactly what I'm experiencing. So once I was diagnosed with autism, it. It literally changed my life because then I understood why. I felt certain ways or what was actually happening while I was why am I feeling like there's electrical shocks going through my body right now because of this one thing and so it was a lot easier to understand myself.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Diagnosed at 21 (Referring to Lucky Light), was learning as a parent, about autism, and then that helped you get diagnosed with autism yourself, and which is quite highly common for autistic women, especially when you're thought you had like a mood disorder, bipolar or depression, because it can be commonly... misunderstood as being autistic and highly misdiagnosed because when you were diagnosed they assumed that you just didn't have any representation, how it affected women and girls. So when you got diagnosed, what are the things that you clicked on that were traits and signs of you being autistic? What were the traits that affected you? And in the moment you got diagnosed, what was it like then, looking back on your earlier life then, and thinking that these things happened because I was autistic?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah the, the first most prominent thing was that I used a pacifier for most of my childhood and I'm so lucky to have a mother that didn't shame me for using it, and so I had it until I was around 10 years old it was a comfort thing, a focus thing, it was my stim, but we didn't know that, my mom just, you know, allowed me to be me, but there was a lot of shame that came from other adults and other kids, so I stopped using it when I was 10. But I still struggled with that same oral stim in bad ways. Like chewing my nails, chewing my lips, like my tongue, my cheeks to the point that they would bleed, picking up bad habits like smoking cigarettes, like anything that was because I had this oral stim just that I needed to feel comfort and focus.so that's a very minor one, but, one of the biggest things was just sensory meltdown. I didn't know anything about sensory and how you can feel overloaded by it or sensitive to it or seek it in other ways. And as a child, again, I was so lucky to have a mom that would just allow me to be me and wouldn't punish me.

I would have points where the birthday party would be too much and I didn't know that it was because of the kids running around and screaming and too many people talking to me and so I would have meltdowns where I would just like that's how I can describe it as it feels like electrical shocks going through my entire body.But the other kids thought that I was being angry, that I was kicking things or throwing myself on the floor because I was angry or I was mean, and I would just kind of explode and have a meltdown, have to be taken home as a child, couldn't have sleepovers because, you know, my social battery would run low.I'd have a meltdown. I'd have to go home. The other parents would call my mom. So those are things, often I experience in so many different ways, grocery shopping grocery shopping, going to the store birthday parties, playing with friends so getting ready for school, the, the if something didn't feel right in my clothes, I would take it off and I'd have to change, and then the clothes coming off and coming back on, it would be so much sensory that it'd be a meltdown again, and so those would be the things that I experienced as a child. As an adult, I was very much experiencing the same thing. But once you become an adult, I was trying to reason, like, have a reason for it with other people. And so, like, with adults, trying to explain it so I didn't just seem like I had issues, or people would judge me, so oftentimes, I would almost find, like, a reason. That it, like, say I'm in a store and we're shopping and it's the lights and the, the music in the store and the people is too much for me, I would have a meltdown but I would make it about, well, I just can't find the size in this shirt that I want and so that's why I'm upset and so it was causing issues, you know, with friends, with my partner and The other thing that I quickly noticed was so different as an adult is I love to perform.

love to dance on stage. I like to act. I like to sing DJ. I shine in that aspect because everything is choreographed. Everything is thought about. I know exactly what I'm doing. And I'm not surrounded by people. Everyone's looking at me, but I'm not having to speak to people.

I don't know. I just, I know exactly what's happening and I, for so long, was like, why is that? Why can I not go to, you know, a small baby shower and talk to people? And I feel so anxious about that, but I can go on stage and I can sing this song and I feel no anxiety. I'm great. I'm, I'm happy.

Autisticly Aar: In a way, you would think that, If there was more awareness of what autism at the time you as a child and you know, be more understanding of how it can present, then, I would assume that you could have got diagnosed a lot earlier than what you could because I guess. Maybe like your school or family may have just seen you as having panic attacks, anxiety, stuff like that, was it? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): yeah, no, exactly. I was often, it, it was always like, oh, I just have anxiety, I would always say that, because that's the only thing I could attribute it to, and I, it, because I didn't know, I was just constantly, Having these issues, but because I know now I know exactly what I need once I feel that way or what is happening or what I need to do also ways to prevent it if, you know, obviously I I go out often because I am a dj i'm in that nightlife scene. I know exactly what I Need to make sure that you know The light coming from the booth is not too much or what I need to do for You know the music and the people not becoming too much. My partner is really great because he carries lot of the social conversation for me when people kind of come up to us and he really helps with being able to Move me to spaces so that I can have breaks or kind of you know Enjoy the atmosphere without] having too many people Talking to me or crowding me so all of that really .So yeah, it just it makes for an easier life, when I didn't it was constant, constant panic attacks, meltdowns. 

Growing Up, What was DJ Lucky Light’s family life like?

Autisticly Aar (they/them): If you wasn't able to be exposed to what the reasons behind sensory issues issues when you're younger, and when your parents saw you as a younger child, and people within your school then If they didn't know much about what could be the causations of your, , reactions to , environmental sensory things that it's because, like, certain things are too bright, it's the wrong textures and all that, then it can look a lot like anxiety. When I look... look at my younger self, some of that, what I learned to know about sensory overload and meltdowns. A lot of my panic attacks they would be symptomatic of my autistic experience, , you grew with up in a family that understood your needs without necessarily having that diagnosis for you at that young age that they understood that sometimes you get bit like overwhelmed and sometimes sensitive or like seen as anxious, whereas the outside world might be seeing you as aggressive in the meltdowns and look at you wrongly. 

When you were younger. you grew up in an environment where you could comfortably use a pacifier, beyond the age of what people socially expect of someone to use that. Using pacifiers there's a lot of stigma that comes with that understanding that a lot about that stigma can help with unmasking autism and understanding that, whether you've got a diagnosis or not. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, it's true. I did grow up in that environment and it's interesting because my mom didn't know anything about what autism might look like in a female or ever think that I was autistic, but When I would have like I have this memory of me having a meltdown in the car and she was so patient with me She never said It was at swim lessons and I didn't want to go in because I had a very long day at school So I was in the car and she never was like you have to go in stop this right nowYou're in trouble she just kind of like let me let it all out and just was like , honey, stop putting your fingernails into your skin. Like, what can I do for you? And just very gracious. Without even a diagnosis, she was just amazing. I'm very, very blessed to have that. I did still have the struggles with the other adults telling my mom, you need to be harder on her. 'You need to punish her when she has meltdowns like that,' or 'something is wrong with her. 'And my mom's like, just. Letting her be herself, and figure it out. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Yeah, as a parent to autistic children, , like you might have been exposed to some of that. You know, like that's a negative parenting from like, your other peers like, parents of, like, kids in the same school as you, or, like, anybody that, like, might be coming across in such environments as you said, there is stigma that's still around it within children in groups and environments.

Lucky Light’s ADHD

Autisticly Aar (they/them): when you got your ADHD diagnosis that I think you said about 16 and oh 18, what, what led to that diagnosis then?

Lucky Light (She/Her): My mom has ADHD and in the states really, once you say ' I have trouble focusing' they're like, 'oh, okay, we'll evaluate you for ADHD.' it's like very easy to, to get an evaluation. I will say like, I feel like a lot of my ADHD traits like overlap with my autistic traits. But the main things I have is like either hyper focusing on one thing, which again can also be a trait of autism, or not being able to, multitask or focus on anything I definitely tend to have more of, like, the hyperactive mind that while I , should be in school listening to somebody speak, I'm thinking about 10, 15 other things. My mind is, rapidly racing. And once I was put on ADHD medication, I did feel like the whole world or my brain was kind of like, boom, boom, this, this, this,. As soon as I was on medication, it just helped me kind of go, oof, I'd like. Focus like my mind was quiet, but I was like more in control of my actions and processes to get things done. I really struggled with. Keeping a clean house like in school, keeping a clean backpack, a clean locker because my mind was a mess and so I couldn't prioritize and so everything else became a mess.

Lucky Light (She/Her): After the ADHD diagnosis, the main thing that opened up was just being able to learn how to prioritize daily tasks, executive function with brushing my teeth, getting dressed, doing the dishes, all of those little, tiny things suffered before the ADHD diagnosis. I always say ADHD, Autistic, and so many of the traits for me overlap. And so it's, it's hard for me to kind of pinpoint exactly 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): yeah. Yeah, get what I mean. If you've got both diagnoses, they both exist in the same med. So if you've got the two diagnoses, it's like, what is ADHD? Autism can become one in the same head. Like there's. All the certain ADHD traits, and then you've got the autism traits they kind of bounce off and work off each they can, you get a bit of both. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yes, yeah no, for sure.the part of me, it's another thing. things that were unusual about me as a child, but I tend to hyper focus on one topic, my special interest and I typically only want to be doing that thing for days on end. I want to be consuming as much information about that topic I like to talk to other people about that topic, and before I knew the diagnosis, I struggled with understanding that not everybody wants to talk about that right now but if I, something hands on, I would not eat, I would forget to pee until I had to go so bad I would forget to, or I wouldn't sleep, I would stay up more hours than normal.

And so that some people say hyper focus, obviously special interest is an autistic trait, but hyper focus can also be an ADHD trait. It's also a reason I think females are always misdiagnosed as bipolar or manic depression because once they see that the woman's staying up much later and not going to the bathroom or not eating, they think,' oh, she has manic depression.': But it's really just once our brain kind of latches onto something, sometimes it's, it's just all we can do. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): As you said about how women it's common to get misdiagnosed of stuff like manic depression . Like stuff like that with sleep and related to hyper focus like, lack of sleep tends to look like. It's something that I also, that, if you don't often ask for the context of why are the reasons you're losing out on sleep. Autistic people are quite literal thinkers and there might be a reason that, you have to do certain things, then, that, if there's lack of being able to, giving the space to explain yourself and giving the space to actually tell, tell you what does that look like.Then it can lead to quite a lot of misdiagnosis. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, no, absolutely. And Yeah, I, for sure, like, not, not being able to, to fully explain and, in the states to the medical system, they just have, boxes that they check, so if you check, , a few of those boxes, they go, oh, this must be it, and they don't really do any, in my opinion of what I've experienced. But I don't feel like they, they do a super deep dive and so a lot of times we are kind of left to do it ourselves and then we have to bring our case to be like, I know that you said that I am experiencing this but I'm also experiencing this and this. Yeah, you really have to push to fully explain yourself.

Getting a autism diagnoses

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Your children got diagnosed with autism and, you know, like you were saying earlier about, like, how you have to fight to, like, get your own diagnosis, and what was it like for them getting diagnosed and what are the things that you noticed that You needed to get a diagnosis at 21, what do you find was, like, the importance, then, of getting the diagnosis for yourself and what do you think would have, what would have been like if you hadn't been able to get that diagnosis when you did? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah well, it, it's, there's a lot of, there's a lot more information online now about Autism, and, and especially on social media it's becoming a trend almost for women in particular to speak out about what it's like to be autistic.

So I was doing a lot of general research by medical documents, looking at things about my children, but through that I discovered some females talking about them being autistic and I, I definitely related more with What they were saying versus some just, you know, black and white paper that I was reading.so that's really what pushed me to even, you know, look into and, you know, I didn't go to my psychiatrist and cause I was currently seeing one for ADHD and anxiety and I didn't go to them. And be like' I want an autism evaluation. Can you please give me one? 'I started talking to them and I was like, 'hey, I've been feeling like I haven't been fitting into these boxes.I've been reading more about, you know, autism and I think that maybe I could be.' And so they were talking to me about it,' well, what makes you feel that way?' And they straight up said, well, 'it sounds like you definitely could be, but we don't do adult diagnoses in the States. You will have to push for that if you think you are.' And I was like,' well, you just said that you think I could be.' And, and she was like' I know, but this is just how it works.' And so I had to be like, okay, 'well, you know, I want to push for evaluation. I would like to do that. And 'she was like, okay, well, best of luck to you.

I will help you do that in any way I can. 'And so that's, yeah, that's kind of how the conversation went. I think today, if I didn't have, that diagnosis I would struggle with friendships because before diagnosis it was always , me offending people when I didn't mean to, or friends thinking that my sensory meltdown was about them that I was, you not stable had a lot of issues, and, and so I think, I would struggle with relationships.] I've actually made so many more friends in my adult life because I'm able to meet people and I have no fear of telling them that I'm autistic and I feel more supported that way and I feel like I don't have to mask as much. I'm allowed to be myself more because they know exactly why. You know, things might be going on where before the diagnosis, I had to mask because if something came out they would question my emotional stability 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): which I'll say that if like before we got, like they've had a diagnosis, then with people questioning emotional stability, then it, it just shows that,, how things can be quite difficult for women or anybody really, or don't have that diagnosis to be like pre with that lens.

Your psychiatrist says that they don't really diagnose autistic adults in the state. I guess, in the United States, I guess you thought, well, how do you get a diagnosis from that? It must have been quite a troubling thing to think of. Like, what is the route to getting a diagnosis as an artist then, because I think then, you know, like, getting told that, like, to somebody else, maybe it could look like a thing that might make them hopeless and might not make them want to try to find a way of... getting any diagnosis or any recognition for being autistic that could lead to a lot more support. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, there's definitely, we almost feel like it's like social inequality, because if you have they say in the States, if you have better insurance and you have more money, then you're more likely to get a diagnosis because you, you can push for more things, more things will be covered. If you have state insurance , You're probably out of luck. And it's a reason why a lot of people for adults, especially recognize self diagnosis for autism, because if you, you know, if you're looking at all the boxes and you are checking all of the boxes and you're saying, I'm having all of these experiences, a lot of people don't want people to not feel supported in that way, if they're saying I am this, but I can't, I can't go through that process.

My advice to any adult that wants to go through the process is think about how, how the diagnosis could help you. If you just need to know the reasons why something is happening because that will help you work through things, then as an adult, I think it is okay to self diagnose yourself and kind of deep dive through that and see if you feel like this is a sensory meltdown when these things are happening, then look into the ways to help that.if those things help you, then there you go. That's your pathway.

My biggest thing was I was working at a bank and I wanted support and different things to help me at work while I was at the bank. I was having some issues with a manager and, you know, specific things and the Bank was coming down hard on me for doing things a specific way, but I was telling them this is how I make sure that my, my drawer is You know, it works for me like with my hands and like the whole process of, you know, counting my money properly and they were saying, well, that's not corporate.): That's not how we do it. There was just, there was a lot of things and I had you know, like support with my type one diabetes disability because I had, That is a diagnosis. So I had support there, but not on other things and I was also gonna say if you are on the road to getting a diagnosis as an adult and you're going through this process the best thing you can do is make a list of exactly how, get it, like, exactly how things are affecting your life.

instead of being like for ADHD if you're like, oh, I just can't focus, don't say that you have to come in with I can't focus I can't prioritize, I don't have executive function and so because of that, my car is filled with trash, my dishes are not getting done that is how it's affecting me. you could do the same thing,with sensory, you have to have those hard examples of how exactly the diagnosis would help and, and the negative impact not knowing or not having support or not having therapy is having on you. So that's my advice. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Yeah, because, like, I think from what you're, like, what you're saying and what I understand about, you know, the importance of self diagnosing, and also the importance of diagnosing in a way that everyone should be able to self diagnose, and in an ideal world it would be great if that you'd just be able to self diagnose and have that recognised and be able to access to support as standard.

But from a, I think from what it mostly is, the reasons why people may wish to get a diagnosis is a lot of the time it's like, for the economical reasons of like, again, supporting work, you know, access to getting those, helping with, Stuff they need help and work and if there's anything that they may need from, like in terms of medical reasons, like getting, I guess, income support or, like, support therapies an essential thing that they may need. If you can make your life work without a diagnosis, as they say, that working out different things on me, help yourself, that make you less anxious, less likely to be sensually overwhelmed by the bright lights and all that, 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, for sure. And the other option that they, they were telling me when I was pushing for the diagnosis is they're like, you know, we can evaluate for other things that may be issues and then treat those on their own. So, maybe anxiety, OCD, ADHD, or just, just sensory processing disorder, you know, if That is easier, somebody can know that they are most likely autistic, self diagnose, and help them, , find support and learn about themselves, but then, the states, at least, for the medical system, get that diagnosis for OCD, or any, or any little thing that is also coupled to kind of help with therapy support if that's what's necessary.

Awareness of autism in childhood to adulthood

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Going back to when you were saying about how it can be different from, you know, like, women, you know, autistic women, as we'll say later on, and how you think that some of the information you may have had previously to have been diagnosed and understanding fully what autism is, as I said, that upon reading a lot of papers , like, that's not how I can understand the experience of autism, especially, like, if you don't fit the kind of standard. old diagnosis criteria for autism in terms of that it looks a lot more like males. Reading a lot more personal accounts does help and some more social elements of it. But you said that when you was in school you had a friend who was also autistic. So what was it like then, when , when you were younger and had a friend who was autistic?What do you understand about autism then, and what do you understand from them about autism? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, so he was actually my neighbor. my mom... And his mom was always like, wow, they play so well together. Sometimes he has issues with other kids. I do remember as a child, something that we would do is parallel play. So he would kind of play with whatever he was doing and I would do what I was doing, but we were happy doing our own things together. It's really hard because it gave me a tainted outlook almost on what autism was because I never saw anything wrong with him. He was a great friend, but I was constantly told by other people that he had behavioral issues.

As a child, I just kept hearing behavioral issues, behavioral issues. And so I think before I knew anything about autism, that's really what I thought it was, was just behavioral issues. I didn't know anything past that bio. The other thing was, I remember there was like a picture painted that, maybe he fully wasn't able to, like do things for himself and so that was also something that was in my head before I knew anything about it.

Lucky Light (She/Her): And then I remember as a teenager and as an adult watching him,, go through school and go through college and get a degree and become a great person and I was like, wow, that's so great because as a child, I didn't think that was, possible. And then once I started actually understanding what autism was, because I literally did not, I had no, no idea I was like, oh, this explains so much about my friend, all these other adults had a very old school, different way of looking at, being neurodivergent and, put me at ease that I was like' so how I felt about my friend was the true outlook and picture of him, not how these other adults are painting him because of behavioural issues.'

Autisticly Aar (they/them): , a lot years ago, like, and even still today, that there's still a lot of negative perception around autistic and neurodivergent people, you know, like, as well as with ADHD because I think still is there's that fear of ADHD being like just behavioral issues when it's a lot more complex than that. If you expose that from a young age , just like the wider society view of, if you hear people from, like, other neighbours or whoever else may be talking, then, like, stuff like that does impair your judgement and makes you a bit more prejudging of autistic people and what autism or ADHD is. 

you've got autistic children now, you were able to look back , as a child, of an example of being autistic then. So what are the things that you learned from your own children about being autistic and the world view of being autistic for themselves? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah well, it is for sure a spectrum because both my children are very, very different.It's, it also made me learn a lot about how it does portray differently in boys versus girls. As a baby when we first started, seeing some things with my son he would bang his head against his crib or the wall. And that's something that my mom said I never did when I was young. Or my other son would spin something that I didn't necessarily do as a child. And so those were some signs that we started seeing and I have, so I have one that is a sensory avoider in most aspects. And then I have another one who is a sensory seeker in all aspects. And he's overly social. Hard eye contact with most other people he may appear, he's not nonverbal, but he doesn't like to speak to people who are not immediate family.

So he struggles with a lot of that. So they're, they're just completely different. And so I think what I learned from my children is that in a way we are experiencing things. In the same way, but the way that we act I shouldn't say experiencing them in the same way because we do experience them differently, obviously, with sensory and stuff, but we share the same struggles.

However, it looks different on different people. And so I think that's where you don't act autistic or you don't seem autistic to me because it is a spectrum and so but it's so apparent to me in both my kids. But it's just in such a different way and it's interesting because they are both part of me and I share little bits of the same Struggles and the same cool parts about being autistic with both of them So I think that's interesting too.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Yeah, because it's like all two people are the same and that's especially about autistic people who are immensely so different from yourselves. And you said that you see lots of things in them like you see in yourself. So what are the things in them that you see in yourself? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): My son Jackson has that extreme hyper focus special interest. Part of me where he gets kind of stuck on something that he loves and he, it's all of him, it's all day, all the time, will literally be laying down at night to go to bed and he's still Talking to I'm like, okay, I love you.Good night. And he's like, Hey, I love you too. Good night. But mom, and then he starts talking about whatever is going on. And I was, I still am very much that way, where, My, my special interest is everything and he does, I don't do this as much now because I understand exactly what's going on and I have a lot of practices that I do in my head when speaking to people to kind of help us along, but as a child and as a teenager I would dominate the conversation about What I was, because my brain was just doo doo doo doo doo, like, about what I was thinking about, and so I would often miss the, the cues from other people that they don't want to, or they're trying to end the conversation, or they're not wanting to talk about that, so my son at seven still struggles with that,. I believe that with age and with understanding that, that does get better, and, and you do learn how to have that conversation where you don't totally dominate.

So that's what I see in him. Then my younger son, he has very similar sensory sensitivities. I see a lot of the same activities as a child that I would go through. k I am already changing clothes. If I have to change my clothes or something that I put on is uncomfortable, that is extremely hard for me, and it's something I see with him on the daily that...He'll be so excited to go somewhere. We're so excited, but once we put on the wrong shirt or the wrong pants or whatnot, and he has to try and change, then we're not going anymore. So those are the things that I see in both of them that are kind of like me.

Focused Interests

Autisticly Aar (they/them): You’re hyper focused on focused interests. What are your focused interests? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): that you have? So right now I have had this as a special interest for most of my life, but just in the last few months, my interest has peaked. So I've been a little bit more into it, but dance in general So I love watching a ballroom dance ballet. Obviously I'm a shuffle dancer, shuffling hip hop. I've been very into the history of it. I like watching dance music videos, studying the movements. I'm highly interested in dance and so in a way that takes up time because I'm wanting to choreograph more dances for me or learn new movements. Anytime I have a special interest that I can also have an activity to do as part of that interest, it tends to take up way more of my time.

I've, my whole life I've loved anything Disney but, you know, watching Disney movies and I like to learn about Disney, so like all of the history of Disneyland and all of the parks and all of the attractions that, it would tend to take up less of my time when that was my focus because there wasn't, It was a lot of like watching and learning versus activities.

With dance, it's watching, learning, taking in information and then doing and creating. It becomes this whole whole giant thing. But I the, I would say so Disney, Disney right now it's dance. And then this one is. Not currently peaked, but has always been a special interest and I can talk anyone's ear off about it for like, ever.I love Alice in Wonderland. I know everything about the writer. Lewis Carroll. His real name is Charles Dodgson. I'll try not to get too much into it, but that's a very big special interest of mine. So not currently peaked, but yeah, any, anytime someone wants to talk to me about that, I will go.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): So about dance, it would be more easy to hyperfocus because it's an activity and it's stimming, spinning a lot of energy and it's a good way to exercise and energy out that you have built in with you. Like you say, you're a hyper person and it seems like a great way for you to get energy out. So how do you get it into dancing?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah so I actually danced most of my life, but I struggled always finding that one dance that I could hone in on because I loved all dance.And so as a child, my mom would struggle because I'd be like, I want to do tap. Now I want to do ballet. Now I want to do hip hop. So I did. All sorts of classes growing up, always danced. In high school I did musical theater, so lots of jazz and ballet and tap. And then how I got into shuffling was actually in 2011 I was in high school.

I was at my friend's house and she had an older sister and they were all ravers and they were listening to, you know, like EDM, electronic dance music. And at the time I didn't listen to any of that. So I was like, Oh, this is like, this is interesting. I kind of like this. I liked the vibration of it.the kind of like the repetitive beats. I literally said, I was like, how do you dance to this? And she's like, Oh, let me show you. So she showed me a very basic move. I tried to do it. I think I was 14. Then I was like, this is too hard. So I didn't really push it.when I was visiting my cousins and they were listening to EDM and they were all shuffling and I was watching them all and I was like, Wow, my whole family can do this dance. I really want to learn. So they kind of started teaching me some basic moves. And from there I took off into watching anything I could find on the internet about it, reading about it, watching people's movements, and I just kind of taught myself. My favourite part about it is when you hear a drop in the music, it makes me excited. I love to hear that drop and kind of makes you just want to,like shake your body, shake your hands, it feels really great. And so kind of shuffling it. There's a lot of power in your body as you're moving your feet to the ground. And it was just a great way for me to kind of take that feeling that I was feeling when the music drops and to be able to do something where people are like, wow, that's cool.

That looks really great. Versus sometimes people would be like, wow, what are you doing? Like, are you okay? As I'm freaking out because of the, you know, the sound and the feeling of the drop. So yeah, it's a great way to expel that energy. 

How did DJ Lucky Light become a DJ?

Autisticly Aar (they/them): And how did you go from, like, interested in the EDM dance and the scene and, you know, getting into that type of culture? How did you go from that interest in it to actually wanting to try to be behind the decks and start mixing and creating music with it? So when was, like, the first time? He got behind a DJ deck and started mixing. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): When I was 14, I shuffled, put it down. But I started listening to EDM then. I met my partner when I was 18 and he was very much into it, and so that kind of piqued my interest in it, and we started to go to raves together, and he has a lot of friends that are DJs, and so, because I was into my 20s, I was getting into the community for shuffling.We were around a lot of DJs. There was always somebody DJing at, you know, the park for us to shuffle to, or we started going to more shows. And it was actually my partner that was like, Hey, I think I want to invest in a. You know, a deck to, to learn how to DJ, you know, would you support me in that? Can I put the money into it?

I said, yeah, I would absolutely support you in it. let's do it. He bought the deck and it sat on our table for like three months and collected dust while nobody touched it. And so I was like. Well, if he's not gonna use it, then I'm gonna use it, and oh my gosh, once I hopped on that and realized all the things that I could do with it, it was, yeah, one giant dopamine rush.

had only been using it for maybe two weeks? When I sent a friend of mine, I was like, hey, will you listen to this, like, little piece that I, I, Did I you know, I'm still learning and they were like Hey, this sounds really good. Would you like to perform at the park in a week? And I was like, yeahI'd only been DJing for like two weeks. So I spent that entire week trying to learn how to throw together my first set. But that's how I started and once I played at that park, it just seemed like kind of the, the gigs started coming to me and I was just getting experience from, you know, putting together the sets and playing live.

The first time I ever DJ'd at a club where there was lots of people I almost quit DJing because the, like, the thought of just all of the, the pressure and all of the people there looking at me, I was like, I don't know if I could do this And so I, like, almost on the way there, I told myself, I'm like, I'm going to play this, this club gig, and then I'm never going to do this again, because I don't like how this makes me feel. As soon as I went up there and I played the set, I was like, Oh, I'm doing this for the rest of my life. This is great. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): It's a place that like a lot of people might not think that or being autistic and people might think that it's a place that can be quite overwhelming for autistic people. But how do you find that you have felt comfortable in exploring that rave culture, going into raves and clubbing, and what are the things that helped you cope ?

Lucky Light (She/Her): When I do go to clubs if I'm DJing, I usually get there 45 minutes before my set. And so I really just kind of get comfortable, get water, play my set and then leave. I even don't do super well in the club space. I do go sometimes. But if the event is six hours long, I'll go for one to two hours.The things that I personally bring is I will bring my pacifier out even to the club space. There's been times that I have forgotten. I leave my pacifiers everywhere. I'm constantly buying new ones, always. So there's been times I've forgotten them And then often I will do things like lollipop or chewing gum, just something to keep me focused.I always bring sunglasses. I prefer the darkest ones you can get. For me, the light does not bother me if it's not shining directly in my face. But if I can't kind of get away from that, I will wear the sunglasses. Even for some people, though, I know that the Sunglasses won't be enough, and so I always say that when you're going somewhere try to understand the space and what it looks like.

I know all of the places where I go in Seattle very specifically, and so I know the places where I'm not going to be able to get away from all of the lights, and the, the places that I can go that I have an area Where I can be where they're not directly in my face. I Personally like loud music because I like vibration, but I have to have earplugs in. It can't just be like raw and then I just suggest for people that are overly sound sensitive if you do earplugs in your ears and then you put like earmuffs or something just like another covering above that really helps and for me, I can sometimes almost barely barely hear the music but I can still hear if somebody needs to talk to me.

So those are some of the things I do to help in the club scene. Again, the overcrowding is very hard for me. Where I always suggest if somebody who is a neurodivergent and sensory sensitive that wants to go experience the rave scene is festivals. Especially outdoor festivals because there's a lot more ways to enjoy it where you're not dealing with lights and too much sound and overcrowding.

I don't even attend that many festivals especially with type 1 diabetes and being autistic, there's a lot of planning that goes into it. I do, Again, this becomes , a money issue, but I prefer to have a VIP pass because those are always less crowded areas where I can still see if I'm why I like outdoor festivals though is because most of them, there is a place that you can lay a blanket and you can sit down like there's been times where I have, I always like having something soft and it makes me feel better, but I have a backpack that is a stuffed animal.

Lucky Light (She/Her): And so sometimes for me to enjoy it, I just kind of hold my stuffed animal, I have my pacifier, I have this and I can enjoy the music, the experience I always recommend knowing where you're going and make sure somebody's with you to help support you and knows what you might need. My partner's great at that. Bring what you need, earplugs, you know, come prepared, sunglasses, pacifier, whatever you need. And yeah, outdoor, outdoor festivals help . 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Yeah, I was just saying that, yeah, I can imagine how outdoor festivals would help a lot more than like it being inside a club because at least then you've got the art open space where like the sound isn't contained in, like, the four walls and that isn't, you know, like gets to, you know, sweaty and crowded because at least then with a, like, festival, even though it's pretty crowded then you can at least find a way of managing to find, like, a quieter area and walk away if needs to be, and easier to be, to find an exit route and, that can reach community people a lot better, and sometimes a lot more festivals are had in a lot more places where you, if you're like, you're a half century or something like that, it's a lot more you know, a certain area so you can go and just take five if you need to be, which is very important.

for the first time, like, this year, I went to a festival myself, which was quite handy that they, like, they started doing one in my town, and that, like, I said that taking, like, your defenders does help because stuff like loud noise can be quite a lot, especially, like, there are quite a couple of different stages quite close together every place it just helps to dampen the sound down then and so then it must and like for when you said that you when you're like a you know DJing and all that and it seems like it's worth like and really and mask and you feel quite liberated in publicly expressing yourself and you’re autistic, authentic self and using stuff like ads on social past fires in festivals.

Using adult sized pacifiers

Autisticly Aar (they/them): So using adult pacifiers again, being in public about it. How do you find that confidence, and do you feel like there's still a lot of stigma there for yourself?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah I when I first started DJing, I would, I didn't have the pacifier and, and something I, I was using it in my personal time I actually had started using it again, , kind of behind closed doors when I had my kids and so I was using it without really anyone knowing and when I was djing I Would be so excited to see the pictures and the videos of me djing and The videos I looked very focused.I was usually looking down at the decks I wasn't really interacting with anybody or you know kind of dancing about and my mouth always looked like this where I had like My lips pinched together, I wasn't smiling, and it's because I was chewing heavily on my lips and I was like, oh, I want to be able to give,not be so focused and give more of that performance value.

So I started one show , I was like, oh, like, I look like a raver with a pacifier trying to console myself. About it, and I was just like telling people like, oh, it's just part of my outfit, and I did a, I, I played at a festival in a campground, and somebody took a video of me, and I was, I had my pacifier, and I was having a blast, like you could just see I was so comfortable with all of these strangers around me, I was enjoying myself and somebody afterwards had asked me why the pacifier?, they're used in rave culture but not for sensory issues. They're often attributed to drug use; it has nothing to do with drug use. I actually use it for stimming. And then I explained to her what stimming meant. She said ‘I think that's really cool, actually. You should tell more people that.’

I took that video of me and I put it on TikTok and I just kind of, like, was venting. I think I made the video in, like, less than a minute. I was just writing a text telling my story of the pacifier my whole life and how it's helped me and it blew up on TikTok. I had over a million views and people, it was nothing but positive comments.Though, nothing was negative and everybody was relating to my story and was telling me like, this is amazing. This made me feel more comfortable. This made me feel this, this made me feel that. And so honestly, that is what helped me. It took other people to tell me this is okay. I feel the same for me to have the confidence to break the stigma.

Still to this day. I sometimes struggle going to maybe the grocery store and using it, like I still will struggle with that confidence of is everyone gonna look at me if I have this in my mouth while I'm with my kids, like is, are they gonna look at me funny so I do struggle with that confidence I think on my, the most confidence I have about About, like, you know, ignoring the stigma about it is, you know, going out going to festivals, being on social media, being with, around my friends or at home. I do think there's a huge stigma around using it.

I did have one time a negative comment on TikTok where somebody told me that I was making autistic people look like infants by saying that to use stuffies or pacifiers. And so I kind of was like, that is the stigma, but that's what I'm trying to break is that adults can use that and it's not infantile. Everybody can use this. Because it's comforting. Society has made it infantile and only children and only babies use these when they are tools for so many people to feel comfortable and to feel okay and to focus and to stim in a healthy way because there's so many ways that, , You could stim that for you.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): I think that's why there's a lot of fear. When it comes to, like, being your authentic self, and especially doing it in public and, and masking in public. with all that stigma, and ableism infantilised, being autistic and having using pacifiers and that can be more stigmatised and uncomfortable for us to publicly do. And, like, seeing your videos also, like, helps myself and having people like social media media themselves tell me about. You know, like too much fear and with confidence, because it's like, with like that confidence and without being able to express ourselves with like joy and, as I say there , when you seem dancing with it, you're enjoying yourself publicly expressing this. That's what changes, like, negative perceptions around stuff like this. Because it's for myself, like. I thought of, , using one in, in my, late teens, but, like, I had ideas of wanting to use one before, but like, sometimes, I use it, like, whenever, , I'm in my bedroom, just, like, when I'm grinding my teeth, and, like, I found was stigmatised, and I think, like, there's something that, stigma would have to overcome to use in public and stuff like that, butstuff like that can be helpful. ,

What was the reason that you wanted to start using one again whenyou was an adult? And what was it that, like, the idea that you thought something that would help with your oral stimming? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): I think originally when I first was like, yeah, that girl's right, I, I should tell people about it, I think it was more for me, and I don't think I realized that it would help so many other people. I think I was thinking about myself in the moment that I was like, I think it would make me feel more comfortable if I was able to tell people that I use a pacifier because I'm autistic, not just as part of, rave culture. I think instead of just posting on my Facebook or posting on my story , I will just, , make a video on, on TikTok.then once so many people related, I was like, I just helped a lot of other people just like they're helping me and it's so important for me to keep talking about it. And, I think sometimes I do still get scared of the stigma, but I think that's why it's so important for me to keep talking about it.It's not just for other people, but to continuously work on me having the confidence to be myself. Because at the end of the day, I think a lot of people don't realize that stimming isn't just... a quirk or something interesting about you to me, finding a healthy way to stim is literally self care. It's taking care of yourself.I am a healthier, better human when I'm able to stim in a safe way. And so I think , that is something that I wish more, maybe neurotypical people understood is how important the stim was. I have run into those issues with my son where he has verbal stims and I have to leave places because other adults will be like, ‘You need to be quiet. You can't be making those noises here. You need to stop.’ And I'm like, ‘Oh, I'm so sorry, but I have to leave because I have to go to a place where my son is okay, can be himself and can be okay, because this is, you know, it's important to me.’  

Autisticly Aar (they/them): it is better for yourself and more healthier. If it comes from that, you want to do it because you think it would make you feel safe, yeah? Safer than happier, but , when you first wanted to first buy yourself an adult sized pacifier for yourself and start using it, what was the reason that you wanted to do that?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah. It's kind of funny, but so I stopped when I was 10 out of shame. And when I was 19, I was pregnant with my first son and I got a bunch of pacifiers for the baby shower. In 19, this is b b before I knew I was autistic, and, I was like sitting on the couch looking at these pacifiers, thinking to myself, should I throw them all away so that he doesn't have to deal with the same feeling of shame as I did if he gets attached to these? Or should I be like my mom and graciously allow him to have these? And, and while I was thinking about that I unwrapped one of them, and I stuck it in my mouth, and obviously it was an infant pacifier, it was not an adult. And I don't recommend anyone uses those. I recommend they, as an adult, use adult sized pacifiers.

It's better for your teeth, your mouth, your jaw. But I immediately felt that feeling that I had felt when I was young. The safety, security, like, just, I don't, it's, it's so hard to explain how stimming feels. But it was at that moment that I was like, I am going to give these to my son, and if he attaches himself to it, I'm going to be gracious like my mom. I am also going to buy myself an adult pacifier and use it [01:04:00] in my own space, because I think I need this. And I would use it very sparingly at first, because I, I think in my head, I still didn't know I was autistic, so I, I still felt the shame and, and especially stigma as an adult so I didn't want anyone to know, and I was trying to not get too attached to it and then it, it was definitely once I learned about being autistic and what a stim was and what was going on that I was then like, oh no, this is something that's necessary,that is when I started to really use an adult pacifier. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): What are the pacifiers you tried and that you would recommend for people to use if they wanted to try something like that? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yes so I have to look at my phone to see the brand. So when, when I go to sh when I play shows I use a flashing pacifier.It's not listed as an adult sized pacifier, but it is not an infant one. I would still say that the nipple is not large enough for everyday use but it's kind of fun for costumes and things like that. I have been questioned a few times about how the flashing lights don't bother me. If the pacifier is facing you, the lights are very bright.

 When the pacifier is in use, they're really reflecting out from you, and you can't actually even tell when it's on sometimes. And so, the lights don't really bother me. But that's what I use for a show performance. It's called Glow FX, but I would not recommend it for daily use. It's not small, but it's definitely not large enough.And then let me quickly find the one, the adult. And I get them on Amazon.It says classic adult sized pacifiers. This is why it's all blurred. That's what they look like though. But they're, they're just. I don't know. I like the I don't know what you call it, but like the, the backside and like the size of it around my mouth.You also have to recognize everybody's mouths are different. I'm a very petite person. I have a smaller jaw, smaller teeth. And so... sometimes it is a little bit trial and error when you're going through the adult size pacifiers just to find one that fits your mouth well, that feels comfortable.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): yeah, there's definitely that, yeah, it definitely is a different person. And For me, like, I do like to try the different brands and, like, I find that there's brands out there, like a company called Pacifier Addicts are quite good because, like I tried the size 10 and that's quite good for bigger size and bigger mouth because, like, a bit more comforting and a bit bigger shield.Stuff like to try to, find what's best and , adult size on social media, I also referenced that before, like, when you was in a clubbing experience, you also had, you know, like, some negative reception about it. So I would feel if, like, somebody's had a negative comment, how have you been able to counteract that and, you know, deal with, I guess, people's judgment around it.

Lucky Light (She/Her): If it's a negative comment that I feel like is negative for no reason or it's just mean, I typically don't respond to them and I just ignore them. Sometimes, though, I do get comments that I feel like are worth talking about. So it may be a perspective that I think is... Common, like a common stigma that I think if I responded to it it would be a good conversation for people to chime in on or kind of like to take their thought and not be like, hey, you're wrong, but kind of be like, what if you thought about it like this?

 so I really only respond if I feel like I can add value to the autistic community by responding to a negative comment. But there's a lot of ones that are just kind of, like, they're trolls. Like, they're just plain mean. And I just ignore those ones. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Yeah. And from, what I said when you was like, young yourself, like, like 19 when you, like, start to I think from that, when he said about, like, he was able to find decoupling mechanisms, easily found ways of, like, stimming and expressing yourself was able to have, like, a childhood where you're quite accepted for your autistic traits, even though you didn't have the diagnosis. It seems like you were seen much more for, like, safer environment and had a, you know, greater space to feel like the, that you could unmask yourself and that where I guess where, you know, a lot of women and girls are really difficult, the experiences they have of trauma and stuff like that.That was not part of me, but, you know, like that, because you could find a way to express yourself and you could have a bad experience, if you get what I mean. Yeah, 

Lucky Light (She/Her): yeah I definitely learned how to mask and It's obviously why the social battery would quickly run low. But I didn't have to mask my parents at all. But I, even our closest family friends. And I can recall the comments of, Why does she do that?Why is she that way? Like, you need to fix that. Something's wrong with her. That's not normal. And so all of those comments are really how you quickly learn to mask. And It's funny as an adult, because Now I quickly realize once I'm masking, like as soon as I am, it almost causes a little bit of anxiety because I'm like, Oh, I'm, I'm masking right now.Am I doing it? Okay. Am I? Oh, no. Now I'm like, hyper aware that I'm doing it. So, and, and I think a lot of times now, because I tell everyone I'm autistic, I, I feel less of a need to mask. It's usually going into, you know, like, maybe a job interview where they don't know off the bat that I am, and immediately I'm like, oh, I'm asking, am I doing it all right?Should I just tell them I'm autistic so I don't have to mask? Is that gonna hurt things? Is that gonna affect things?

Parenting Autistic Children 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Having good parents and having a nice, family there, and you could be, like, yourself, and didn't have problems in the household as some people face. Having autistic children yourself and understanding a lot more about your autism and your children's autism. So [01:11:00] for parents of autistic Children or like who were suspected children might be neurodivergent. What advice would you give parents of autistic children? 

Lucky Light (She/Her): So my, my biggest advice is that we. want them to be able to take care of themselves and to be the happiest, healthy version of themselves that they are. But that doesn't mean that we have to mold them into the block of a person that society would like us to mold them into. Because neurodivergent people don't, we don't fit that mold. You can cause more harm than good. And I think Choose your battles. So if there is something that is causing harm to your child, we need to figure out how to make that better in their life. But if there is something like they're a small child, and they like to watch the washing machine while the load is going. That was something I liked to do, and I still like to do it. Let them, because that is not hurting anyone, and that is what they want to do. They're going to be different from you, and you have to look at the parts that are different, and make sure that you are creating a safe space for them wherever they go. And if they are going into a space where they are not welcome because of, you know, the basis of who they are and that part of them doesn't hurt anyone, then You don't go to that space. Yeah. Just safety. Making an autistic child feel safe. And helping them understand why they are different. The cool things that are the cool things about being autistic, because there are so many, in my opinion. It can be like a superpower. Sometimes the disability really comes from society putting pressure on people  to be a specific way, and that can cause much more disabling of a person than anything, and that's my opinion.

Making DJ’ing work

Autisticly Aar (they/them): As somebody who, yourself, you're a, a DJ who's also a mother when women who haven't always got a representation in the field of DJing and being a club DJ on a big stage DJ, and it's not something that, it's been typically male dominated and something that, you , a lot of the space has been lacking the support that you would.want as a woman who has a child who has a child and, you know, is also autistic. So, what it is like managing the DJing life and also, like, a family life, and also, Autistic .

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah it's a struggle for sure, it's worth it but, you know, I, I get overwhelmed very often. And so when you, when you have three autistic people in one house, there can be competing access needs where one because there is not loud music or sound going, he has to verbally stim very loud. The other one wants it very quiet. I'm just trying to attend to the needs of both my children while also trying to do things to help me with sensory issues. So all of that on top of DJing I would say DJing actually fits nicely into our life because my one son really likes, you know, working on sets with me and, and likes also working on the decks and hearing the music.

Oftentimes, he will sit with me and do that while my other son will be with my partner. There's definitely a lot of structure that goes into doing multiple things so making sure that the kids go to school and are cared for while also working on social media or, having different time setup every day to work on a set by a specific date. So lots of scheduling in our life because there's a lot of different moving parts. Being autistic, or ADHD, , this can be an attribute for either, I thrive on a schedule I have to know , when I'm doing something, how the day is going so that it can run smoothly. If I start off a day with no schedule, everything is extremely overwhelming and it's hard to prioritize to Go from, , A to B to C and, and have a productive day.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): It does help if having a schedule and all that stuff to, you know, manage the, like, the over and above so many different tasks that you may need to do in a day and just managing all the different things, like being a parent and doing the DJ and stuff.: And so what, like, how do you think like the, you know, how accessible do you think that DJing is for, to stick and there like virgin people on the, the club, eh, experience of like DJ DJing clubs and, and what are the things that you would like to be able to see that improved? To make sure that they are more disabled, and also disabled women and people of minority genders in the , like industry.

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah. , I think that the club space and even the festival space could be more accessible by having more resources available. Specifically, you know, for neurodivergent people. I played a show with a group called Peer Pressure,] and I really, really enjoyed it. The, one of the founding members is autistic.they had a sensory room that not only was kind of away from the direct music at the space, but also had different things just for, you know, like actual like sensory like things to play with but also just different things like headphones or whatever somebody needed to kind of be able to be in the club space and enjoy it while being a neurodivergent or having a sensory sensitivity.

So I really liked playing that show and I definitely want to see more of that. It's definitely lacking And even with information about being autistic, becoming more available and more people understanding it in today's age a lot of times I find that, you know, somebody may be at a club and be like, I have this issue.

I'm not or say I'm autistic. And somebody goes, Oh, that's so cool. And you kind of feel like they're accepting of it. But the moment, , somebody may need help because of any issue that's going on, or they may need resources or support, it seems like there is some of that lacking from clubs themselves and festivals themselves when I give people advice on going to these places, it's usually what you're doing for yourself and having a support person to also help you because truly there needs to be, you know, more accessibility, more resources for disabled people in general to go to events of all people disabilities. I even struggle with some things with type 1 diabetes that I shouldn't struggle with at festivals. So, no, that's definitely something that there needs to be, you know, more change for. As far as being an autistic female DJ I, I am happy to have the success that I've had but it's definitely, I see a male dominated scene, and I do feel like that there is definitely a lack of disabled people in the festival scene especially. I would like to see way more representation, but I think, , how we get that is more people , is the more that I post, not just me, but anybody who is a disabled or a person of color or a woman to post, I am a DJ, this is what I'm doing and putting their stuff out there can really help open up the scene.

I mean, at the end of the day If somebody is, you know, a woman DJ or disabled or a person of color, people need to put all of their support because if you think about it, the top people at these festivals, they are going to hire who they think people will buy tickets for. And so if you see somebody that,] you know, will help diversify representation in this industry. Support them the absolute best you can because at the end of the day, that is how things will change. It starts with us, the fans

Autisticly Aar (they/them): I assume that if, like, a lot more DJs speaking up, like, well, you know, women and, you know, people of minority genders, people of colour, and disabled people, if, like, more speak up about any use of platforms, like yourself too, can actually increase the people who, who attend the festivals and get booked on the lists of people booking the festivals. And that will probably take a lot more years to get to the place.Having these conversations could at least make people think, like At least some of the things they can start introducing to places to make things a bit more accessible for the disabled festival goers to club goers. a lot of things that for women, people of minority genders, L-G-B-T-Q to people of color, there's a lot of things that needs to be improved with festivals and stuff like that.

They think it's probably something that. As, like a DJ yourself, somebody's booking on, booked up to play the festivals, like, it probably, like, has a great impact if... You yourself, like you are talking about it, to actually put pressure on, like, for there to be more introduction of certain things for, you know disabled festival goers.

Because, like, sometimes like, you think of, you know, artists getting booked on to certain festivals so they can book like, a lot of the higher the bills can get more writers and, you know, like, certain things that, They would want to accommodations for and for to be pertain to that.

Also that is the same for the festival. Go is something incredibly important because as you say that it can assume that you find this a lot easier to make things accessible as a performer as tourism sometimes. You go as a, you know, a festival goer or somebody who's tending like a music concert and stuff like that. 

Lucky Light (She/Her): Agreed. There's a lot of change that needs to happen and, and especially people with platforms, like it's very important if they have a large platform. I don't know if but something I want to see more of is I have so many great friends that are trying to make changes in this industry especially the club scene and the festival scene.

My friend Kamir, they are actively trying to make safer, more inclusive, more accessible spaces by, you know, holding a You know, more inclusive, accessible festivals and all sorts of things, they're actively trying to make a change but they, you know, are a minority of gender, they are trans, and I would like to see more allies, people who are neurotypical, you know, who are like, Not in the community to have a little bit more support in the community and support these groups I think that is important as well for not just, you know, neurodivergent people to be speaking out about this But then the neurotypical people with platforms also to also support and to also speak I think that helps Tremendously to have those allies.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Because that's the way that if like you get a support of people who are not in from the community, those minority communities that's when you can start to get , like booked into mainstream environments and actually have those accommodations into mainstream environments that can make it a lot [01:24:00] more easier to make a living from it, because I guess nowhere seeing that, you know, when the industry, especially for people of minority backgrounds, who are more likely to be further down the bills of like certain festivals, can be quite harder to, you know, make the same income as other, you know, people from majority, you know, groups on like festivals.

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yes. Agreed.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): What type of music are you like to listen to and you like to play in festivals? What, like, the songs that you tend to have on your playlists?

Lucky Light (She/Her): So the music I like to play at festivals and shows is house music. I love bass house and big room house electro house. Those are like my sub genres that I like to play. As far as As an artist I'm also working on producing music and releasing some sometimes soon in the general genres would be house and some sub genres of house.as far as listening to music, I go to a lot of house shows, but I, I love music so much. That I really listen to every genre of music. So every subgenre of electronic dance like a hardcore, hard style, dubstep house music, trance. I really love them all. And then even non EDM genres, I listen to. Especially at home because the environment can be chaotic with my kids if I'm not actively, like, shuffling or dancing or working on sets, I tend to listen to more, like I listen to, like, classical instrumental, acoustic, folk music there's A lot of that stuff is kind of the the music I enjoy during the day to help just keep, you know, a calm environment which I think is interesting because I think a lot of DJs mostly listen to EDM. Maybe dubstep DJ, you might listen to, , also metal because they have, , similar in line with each other. Yeah. And I, I just really love everything. There's like a time and a place in my life for every type of music. And I'm the same way about dance. I love all dance shuffling and hip hop and ballroom and ballet are all so different, but I, I appreciate them all. I say the song that. I've been listening to a lot lately is 

this album it's called brightest lights by lane eight and it was released in 2020 and it's more like a trance music. But it's very like I don't know. it creates like that calm environment while still like it's still EDM. So it still has those vibrations and My children enjoy it the whole house enjoys it.So it's on repeat most of the time.

Autisticly Aar (they/them): When you were saying about, the disabled people that are, doing things in the industry, so, like, what are the people that you would recommend following, or like, supporting work yeah, 

Lucky Light (She/Her): The first one is SMU Productions. They are a company that is working on becoming a non-profit but they've been really amazing in the community and doing a lot of amazing things. Completely inclusive as far as people of color, gender, disabilities. Really just trying to make... The whole rave community is safe, inclusive and accessible. They are a group that I highly recommend. Also peer pressure. These are their Instagram handles. So yeah, just peer pressure. They] are also really big on creating safe, inclusive spaces. Especially for a neurodivergent. And then also, one of my favorite things is that all of the DJs on the bill that have to play for them, they go through a sexual harassment nightlife seminar.It's like a little class. That you do but it's really important that all of like the staff and the people playing focus on creating a safe nightlife experience because at the end of the day that is something that is very important, especially in club spaces is what to do if you see sexual harassment how to You know keep other people, safe in the Industry.

So I would say they are another really good group to follow. Both of them are here right now currently in Seattle, but I hope that they grow and spread nationally or worldwide because they're two really amazing groups, but the change starts with us and then, hopefully it grows.So those are two off the top of my head that I can recommend. 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): That would be great for people to follow and support them because, as you say, that to make these things changes for groups like these to be supported along the way to make these changes and

Lucky Light (She/Her): I think just that , anybody who is wanting to use their platform for anything. So, if you want to make a change, like some of these groups that I have recommended or you just want to tell your own personal story or if you are...Autistic and you want to be a DJ, but you don't know how to start. Whatever you want to do, social media can feel scary, especially from the pressure of feeling like you need to quickly build a following or have thousands of people listen to you or for your post to blow up, but that's not important. Going viral is not important. If you have only a hundred people that see your video with whatever purpose it has, you only need one person to see it for it to, you know, spark change. Or for somebody to see your video and go, Wow, I, I want to book you for a show. So just keepMaking that content, because social media can be very powerful. It's not shameful or bad to not have views. No matter what your purpose is, you can use it as a tool to better yourself or help other people, or create change. 

One Thing

Autisticly Aar (they/them): What one thing that you would like to see changed for neurodivergent and disabled people in society?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah, ooh, there's so many. I think that I would like to see... In school and work systems, and I know that this is changing and there are a slight, there are resources, but I would like it if things like stemming or resources for.how do I put this in a, in a very, so for example, you know kids in class, you know, we're always told to take notes or to sit in our chair to be still different things like that. It's not an inclusive learning environment for neurodivergent people. And it's also not an inclusive work environment for neurodivergent people.I wish that it was. easier for a neurodivergent person to be in school or to have a job and to say, I need this to succeed and to be able to do my job or to be into school and to not have to go through so many hoops in order to get that approved. That it's it can be just like, yes, you can have that if that is how you do your job, or you can have that so that you can succeed in school.

I still think they're. is too much of a process. And as a child, if you have a parent supporting you, very great help. As an adult, when you are in a workspace, if they tell you, you can do that. If you first fill out this paper, talk to this person, call this person, get this done, especially for an an ADHD autistic person.That is so many steps in order to get something done to support you. And if you don't have, you know, a parent who is supporting you, it won't get done and you will struggle. So hopefully that was a very long explanation, but that is what I would like to see in a workplace, in school, in society. And lastly, 

Last Words

Autisticly Aar (they/them): is there anything you want to promote or?

Lucky Light (She/Her): Yeah[01:33:00] TikTok is at Lucky Light with an underscore at the end. My TikTok is one of my favorite platforms because I, Host the most about being autistic and type one diabetic and just disabled in general.I feel like for resources, especially relating to, being a DJ or going to festivals or clubs, there is some information and things that I've shared on there. My Instagram is the same at lucky light, just with three underscores. There is. More, I would say just in general, dance and DJ content on my Instagram. I have a SoundCloud, which is just LuckyLight. That's where all of my mixes are on for me DJing to listen to my music. And then, as I said, I am working on producing music, but I have a very busy life, so I don't have a date set, but I'm hoping that it's early024 that I have my own music.Released and in Seattle here locally, I have a show on november 11th in Seattle. It's at VU Lounge. And then I am the headliner, so I don't go on till later in the night. But you can get you can RSVP or get tickets on through the link that is in my Instagram 

Autisticly Aar (they/them): Thanks again to DJ Lucky Light Coming on this week's podcast you can find more about her on the episode description and more about this podcast@ www.neurorainbowproject.com where you can find how to read watch and listen to this podcast with many more resources and extra bits. Like if you want to use the 5%. discount with pacifieraddict.com for first time customers only you got till the end of this year the 31st of December to use] the code that again is. N E U R O C A S T. When you check out r. Recently I bought from there with good sizes and options to other neurodivergent people I highly recommend trying a pacifier in the next year for Podcasts new series launching called pacifying with Autisticly Aar so stay tuned for More announcements in the coming weeks And more guests involved with that Podcast series and how that pans out that's it from me this week with me Autisticly Aar